Three Stooges Remake in Trouble

Uh-oh! Sean Penn has dropped out of the Farrelly Brother's newest project, a remake of the beloved Three Stooges. Since the cast announcements earlier this winter there has been a lot of anticipation for the film. Moe is to be played by Benicio del Toro, Curly by Jim Carrey and Larry was to be portrayed by the now retreating Sean Penn. That was a winner cast, one that made me feel much more comfortable about the Farrelly Brother's directing. I personally haven't found anything they've done appealing since 2000's Me, Myself & Irene. Regardless, now there is a rather large spot to fill unless of course they decide to wait out Penn's staycation? Maybe not the worst idea. The only other Larry nominee I can come up with is David Paymer.

What do we think world?

Son of Rambow

This came up amongst my recommended movies on my newly renewed Netflix account and I recalled hearing about it last summer sometime. After reading the description and seeing the 75% approval on RottenTomatoes.com I immediately put it on my queue and moved it straight to number one! I expected a quirky comedy full of foul-mouthed, witty children re-enacting Rambo--c'mon that sounds like lots of fun--but instead what I got was pointless, vapid, boring tripe. I stopped watching after about 35 minutes, left it on but just ignored it in favor of other, severely less entertaining activities like cleaning. Still, the cleaning was the clear choice. Then of course news of Michael Jackson was released which gave me something else to focus on while my waste of rental played out alone and unwatched in the other room. Overall I don't plan to give the film another go and I will absolutely not recommend it to anyone. Goo.

Drag Me To Hell

It's been almost two weeks since I saw the 10:50 showing of this film at an overpriced downtown Chicago theatre (thanks Joe!) and I'm still trying to come up with my opinion. The first time I saw the trailer for Drag Me To Hell I became about as upset as I was the first time I saw the trailer for The Exorcism of Emily Rose--which I've since enjoyed OnDemand no less than 30 times with my roommates Katie and Poppy (as well as an occassionaly bereft, whimpering Lauren Lipovic) to learn that I love and find it hilarious--which became a game of how quickly I could leave the room so that I didn't have to sit through it crying in a puddle of fear and urine. With Drag Me To Hell the feeling of 'please don't make me watch that again' resurfaced in a way I would've never expected. Where was Alison Lohman's retainer from Matchstick Men? Why was Justin Long doing this to me? I actually began a post on this entitled "Please Stop Showing This On TV!" which was obviously abandoned, for the following reasons.

1) Good reviews. When a movie is good by the standards of those I trust and read I want to see it.

2) Word of mouth. I heard countless praises from friends and friends of friends not only that the film was worthwhile but also that it was much less scary than advertised to the point of often being funny. Evil Dead, Army of Darkness, Spiderman 3...funny was definitely a possibility and a great alternative to me being horrified all night.

3) Acting chops. Alison Lohman has been hailed as a great actress since her big breakthrough performance in White Oleander and Justin Long is one of Hollywood's newest and most talented leading men. I figured the pair probably weren't about to make a flop, especially on their first try at a horror flick.

4) Hutzpah. I'd become profoundly brave when it comes to scary movies. Lie. Wrong. No.

The movie was not bad. I'll start by saying that since I am kind of thinking my way through this post the general critique may sound as if I didn't enjoy it, but I think all-in-all I did. Perhaps it's because I genuinely feel as though I got what I paid for (take that however you want) or maybe it is because the 7 obese black women next to me, literally, were the most entertaining, cliche, fun group of movie-goers I have ever seen. My section of the tenth row and two men in the eleventh became a little community and I was truly glad about the commentary being provided by all involved.

That, however, was almost the only thing that gave credence to the 'this movie is funny' claim, for me. It is the only reason I made it through the majority without dying of fear. That, and the small bits of negative space created by my cross-hatched fingers that I watched nearly the whole thing through. But, for those who did not listen to Queen Latifah scream, "Hell no! That bitch crazy! Lock the damn door! Don't go in there! Dang, you stupid! Girl, you better not!" the whole time, you have no right to hoodwink easily frightened human beings like me into thinking they are well suited for this movie! On that note, I don't know how to rate it on the fear scale because I'm such a horrible baby and was truely terrified throughout so I thought it was very successful whereas many might not find it as scary.

The intro was straight to the point and set the tone of the rest of the film which I didn't mind, I almost appreciated the heads-up. Then came the opening credits. Ugh. As a general rule I do not like opening credits. I find them painful and long and better suited for the end, and by that I mean I want the scrolling credits--with outtakes is a plus (Rush Hour 2)--not the extended Microsoft Powerpoint effects version. That being said, when opening credits are good they are very good. These were not very good. They were very bad. The music was way too loud even for theatres and it was just the most melodramatic crap I'd ever seen. Is this what some found funny? No, for me it was just irritating. I didn't like the scrolling, self-appearing, fake gothica book art. I did however like the abrupt and over-fontisized title. Classic Sam Raimi, nice. Credits over, right back into the story. Yay!

Again, not a lot of waiting around or unnecessary setup. Making up for all of the useless credit time. Once the story presents its first scare they just do not quit it. It was like every five minutes they needed something to give me a heart attack. Well done, I nearly died. The yells and screams of my neighbors were my saving grace, as well as the comfort I find in nervous laughter. My co-worker and accompaniment for the evening, Joe, challenged me that this loud gasp, cringe, curse and spell of guffawing everytime something scary (even if I was the only one who thought so) happened was me legitimately being amused. My after-movie confusion over why someone had tricked me into assuming comedy would be provided was accused of being a cover-up. No, I did not lie, that is just how I handle certain situations. First bikini wax: no yelling, no crying, just literally laughing hysterically and yelling obsenities with every damn strip pulled. I digress.

Constant surprises or thrills or whatever you want to call them. You know those tense moments in horror films where the music gets really serious and starts to build up because something is about to pop out or some type of scare will ensue but then it just ends up being an open window or the dog or some comforting alternative? Nope. None of that. They went for it every time, which I suppose is a good thing, and again, I certainly got my money's worth as far as quantity, but I was struggling through the sheer bulk. I require recovery time.

The other thing that I feel retrospectively irksome about is that I thought there wasn't a great deal of variety with what was scaring you. Scary old woman dream, scary shadow demons, something gross coming out of someone's mouth--waaaaaaay more of that than I wanted to see--and into someone else's face. Definitely a higher frequency of gross-out scares than I typically *Eli* enjoy. However, though they may have lacked in originality that didn't keep them from scaring me shitless every time. 

About three quarters into the movie I began to see the "funny" aspects, some parts began to get a little campy but that might have to be expected from the man who attached a chainsaw to Bruce Campbell's arm and turned him into a zombie-killing machine. This made the experience easier to handle for me so I won't fault it. I guessed the ending about 20 minutes before it came so no real surprise but the members of En Vogue next to me found the twist shocking, thus I will give it the thumbs up. The abrupt end is something that left me feeling very WTF at the time but thinking back on it I don't think I would've enjoyed any other conclusion played out in any other way. 

Final opinion, well done. You did what you set out to do. It was well acted, definitely sufficiently scary, and for the most part a more successful horror film than is usually available. I'm still sitting on the fence, it might require me to revisit the film so I can decide what I actually think but for now: solid B+

*Sam, I will not take the shot of vodka you are pouring for me right now. Shut up and go watch About A Boy.

*I took it.

New Release: Moon

Moon comes out today! I can't wait to see it!

Grand Torino: The Drinking Game

First off, all credit for the invention of this retrospectively obvious--but nonetheless effective and entertaining--game goes to my friend Adam and whoever he created it with or hi-jacked the idea from. You drink when Clint Eastwood is racist. I dont know if you've seen this movie or not, you should regardless because it is excellent, but plan to never stop drinking. Dont get it? Let's really break this down. You're watching.

"'Oh, I've got one. A Mexican, a Jew, and a colored guy go into a bar. The bartender looks up and says, 'Get the fuck out of here.'"

Drink.

"Get me another beer, Dragon Lady! This one's running on empty."

Drink.

"And you know why? 'Cause you're a big fat pussy. Well, I gotta go. Good day, pussycake."

This one is really less about racism and more about how awesome it is to hear Clint Eastwood say "pussycake". Drink.

Well that's pretty much it. Simple. Fun. Laced with bigotry. I'm going to see Grand Torino at the Brew & View tonight with a 30 of cheap beer that will definitely be gone by the credits.

Street Dreams

This looks seriously awful. The bad cameo's and mis-cast lead actors leave a lot to be desired for this movie. 

Imaginary Kid's Tales Are the New Black

Bedtime Stories: An Uncle's life is controlled by the imaginations of his niece and nephew.

Imagine That: A father's [work]life is controlled by the imagination of his daughter.

Okay...so we have the original (I use that word loosely) Disney version, then the knockoff, Sandler-hating, urban-injection (there was a time when Eddie had some street cred) Paramount take, so next....Tyler Perry presents Madea's Dream Vacation where Madea's shot at going on the trip of a lifetime is stolen so she dreams up every way possible to ruin it for the imposter and the vacation of dreams becomes a hilarious, slangy nightmare! HAHAHAHAHA. By the way, all of this will happen before 2009 is over because we definitely need 3 movies based on the exact same premise within a 12 month period.

*While technically Bedtime Stories was released in 2008 it only made the deadline by 6 days so fuck that, besides two of the same movie--essentially--within a 6 or 7 month period is still terrible. Not that a romantic comedy based on the love, love lost, love found ideal isn't recreated daily. My point--Someone, anyone, please--pleeeease make a new movie.

Updateless

Apologies for the lack of posting this past week but I've just been too busy loving these people.

I Will Die Happy; Countdown to a Sexy, Daniel Day-Lewis Induced Musical Coma: Nine

So as most people know it isn't every day that Daniel Day-Lewis agrees to be in a movie. In fact, once everyone realized that he is the most talented actor alive--which he is--he really removed himself from Hollywood and the filmmaking industry to focus on his family, returning only because he:
a. Was tricked into having lunch with Martin Scorcese and Leonardo DiCaprio so they could convince him to return for his would-be first film in 5 years and play Bill "the Butcher" Cutting in Gangs of New York--good work guys!
b. Support his wife Rebecca Miller, daughter of famous writer Arthur Miller, in 2005's The Ballad of Jack and Rose which she wrote and directed.
c. Is talented, and a talented person will know another talented person when they see one, or when they get a phone call (cough, impromptu visit to a cobblershop where a certain Mr. Day-Lewis was apprenticing, cough) from Paul Thomas Anderson.

Seriously though, I was happy to see him three times in 5 years--I considered that a treat--so in the fall of 2008 when it was announced that he would be in ANOTHER film coming out in 2009 I was fucking psyched. Then, on top of all that, the film was announced to be an adaptation of the musical Nine. Brilliant. I myself have never seen the show but I am a giant fan of big budget Hollywood musicals and there is no way in hell he would ever be in something less than spectacular, regardless because anything he is in is immediately rendered incapable of being less than spectacular anyway. This movie became officially exempt from negative criticism the second he stepped on board, however, had he not one could still predict great things because of the remaining cast.

Academy Award winners Dame Judi Dench (epic British talent), Marion Cotillard (gorgeous French siren talent), Penelope Cruz (spicy upgrade Spanish talent), Nicole Kidman (will stop being boring and remind everyone she can act, smile and play a quality temptress Australian talent), Sophia Loren (legendary iconic diva cougar Italian talent), Academy Award nominee Kate Hudson (cute redeeming blonde Hollywood legacy bubbly seductress talent) and Stacy Ferguson (Fergie. Random and not my favorite idea but the girl can sing and dance, and sometimes not look like a tranny talent (tentatively)). Not much to question with that cast. A who's who of some of the sexiest women in the world now, then and always with a man who oozes accolades and humble, off-the-charts sex appeal . Then there is the story.

Daniel Day-Lewis is a filmmaker who attempts to balance his work and personal life while coddling his relationships with the women around him. This provocative musical of mistresses filled with burlesque, cabaret, drama and deciet and a bunch of seriously sexy people is about to make my life complete. I will gladly watch hours of him getting it on with this group of ladies. It will be nice to see him play someone mild, vibrant and charming yet intense, troubled and corrupt.

The trailer looks phenomenal. Costumes, lovely. Set/Lighting, fantastic. Music, incredible. Cinematography, always great to see how people pull off the film-within-a-film idea. Choreography, bomb. This movie is going to be amazing. Expect to hear about it. A lot. Scheduled for a November 25 release and directed/choreographed by Rob Marshall (of Memoirs of a Geisha and Chicago--hell yes) this will be epic. E-P-I-C.

Watch the trailer in HD, then watch it again, drink some water, take a cold shower, continue watching. Repeat. 193 days. I am crippled with excitement. I'll go change my pants now.

I encourage you to visit the site and watch it in the larger scale HD version, this is the best I can fit on here without cutting anything off. http://www.traileraddict.com/trailer/nine/trailer

Russell Brand to Star in Remake of Drop Dead Fred

I for one am excited about this. I think the original film--which starred now imaginary actress, and Mrs. Kevin Kline, Pheobe Cates and comedian(?) Rik Mayall--was a hot mess but with some work the story was actually a rather funny idea. Good film gone wrong in my opinion. I saw Drop Dead Fred at a friend's house in like 6th or 7th grade and she had a much more advanced sense of humor than I did then so she thought it was hilarious but I missed it completely. Since then I've seen the film a few times and now I understand the cult appeal behind it. While it got dismal reviews and did nothing at box-offices it has become one of those movies you hate to love and looooove to hate, thus it is a giant cult hit. Not giant like The Big Lebowski but giant as in those who like it really like it.

Anyway, the reworking of the film is under-way and not a lot of information has been released. So far we know the answer to the big question though, Fred will be played by uber-comedian Russell Brand. Now Brand of course is known for his recent American film Forgetting Sarah Marshall and the upcoming Get Him to the Greek but he is honestly a huge star overseas and I think he is one of the funniest guys out there. I am mildly obsessed. He is eccentric, brash, unafraid, unapologetic, witty and just fucking funny. Who better to wreak havoc on the life of a downtrodden young woman? No one! I think he is the perfect choice and will be the key to the new film's success (hopefully). SNL writer Dennis McNicholas, who most recently wrote Will Farrell's latest Land of the Lost, is already on board to do the bulk of the story while LOTL collaborator and director Brad Silberling may be in to direct.

We'll have to see when Land of the Lost comes out whether or not we have the faith in this duo, but at the moment I have high hopes. As more information comes out about the cast there may be some rise and fall in my optimism but for now Universal exec's have said they want the film to be more of a likeness to Beetlejuice and I think the slightly darker, twisty approach mixed with Brand's dry, adult humor will pull this one off. Penny for your thoughts?


*Update: Land of the Lost blows. I'm sad. Opportunity for redemption? Please!!!!!

Crash

So I'm getting ready to go to work, and by that I mean watching Crash on FX and eating cookies and completely forgot about a certain someone with a certain uncomfortable cameo. I really don't have much that I want to say about this movie at the moment besides, does anyone else think it's really awkward and out of place to have Tony Danza (mcwhats?!) play the racist actor to Terrence Howard's repressed director? I mean really, how did he even land this role? And who was there in his audition where he just threw around a lot of racist slurs and went "Ohhhhhhhh thats convincing, Tony, formerly of the Danza show, is a big time actor who never played a manny/housekeeper and is a raging bigot". It is just borderline funny because of how unrealistic and weird it is. Random. Please filmmakers, dont do that again.

PS. The little girl with the inpenatrable cloak is the cutest thing ever, and when she runs out and blank blank blank happens (no spoilers here folks!) and then she says _____ to her dad, precious. Crazy precious, gimme one.

Nevermind, I suddenly have things to say about this movie but I'll keep it short. Whoever managed to make an Academy Award winning film starring Brendan Fraser, Matt Dillon and Sandra Bullock (with the help of actual actors Don Cheadle, Thandie Newton, Ryan Phillipe, Don Cheadle, Don Cheadle and Terrence Howard) gets a high five. Great ensemble apart from the above-mentioned. And the part where Sandra Bullock falls down the stairs is stupid. Oh, and I recall HBO was going to create a spin-off show, thank god that never got on it's feet. Ok, that's it!

Keanu? Really?

This isn't going to be another commentary on how Keanu is a bad actor and manages to make every serious moment in a film seem like it was a production at an Orange County High School but why do casting directors keep picking him?! Wait, no, he probably didn't have to audition which is even worse. He has just been chosen to play the lead in a new Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde remake and what a mess it will be, not that there have been recent successful attempts at it (frankly the best I've seen lately is the tiny segment in The Pagemaster), but c'mon, it really is a great opportunity to make a dark, dramatic film that takes a smart approach to looking at human nature and you pick freaking Keanu Reeves. Fail. I mean for fucks sake, pick Hugh Jackman if you want an overrated actor--not that I'm not a fan, I totally watch Van Helsing every time it's on TV and think Mr. Jackman has upgraded since The Prestige--but not Keanu. His only saving grace was The Matrix and yes, only the first one, yet he continues to be cast in movies with potential like A Scanner Darkly which worked only despite him, and Much Ado About Nothing which he famously destroyed. Please, keep him in movies like The Replacements so that he can actually be enjoyed without trying too hard. He knows kung-fu, not how to act guys. The Strange Case of Dr. Dude and Totally Hyde should be great. Idiots.

Countdown to: Where the Wild Things Are

Alright, this one is no big secret. For the past year there has been excitement surrounding Spike Jonze's latest film, an adaption of the best children's book of all time, WHERE THE WILD THINGS ARE!!!! At the moment it is scheduled for an October 16, 2009 release date and sweet jesus I hope that turns out to be true because if it gets pushed back I, along with the half of the world that matters enough to care, will cry myself to death. There is already so much to be said for this film. From the first seconds of the trailer with the signature Wild Things scratchy, bitten, askewed font and logo you know that whatever follows will officially be the tits. And it is. First off, it marks Spike Jonze' first "real" writing credit for a film which may seem scary, especially because his co-writer is another newcomer, Dave Eggers, but reports have said that he has been in close contact with Maurice Sendack (writer of the original book) throughout and he has given his 100% approval of the screenplay. Thank god.

Secondly, costuming. Sweet. Despite heavy CGI in the film I fully expect awards for the incredible likeness maintained, Max's costume in the film looks just like the homemade version from the book brought to life. Come to mention the CGI, I AM SO FUCKING AMAZED! I showed the trailer to my mom and aunt and it took those two about half an hour to realize the animated Wild Things weren't puppets. They were so stuck on The Dark Crystal it was insane. As of now I'm not sure if the amount of live-action (if any) warrants any sort of Best Animated Picture nominations but hell I pick it for Best Picture period at this point! The characters look so realistic I forget when watching the trailer that a computer could possibly create something so real. I cannot give enough kudos to the team behind this film for bringing to such realistic, perfect life to these unforgettable drawings and images. I am just in awe. Then there is the music. The trailer already gives a peek of what is in store with a re-recording of the Arcade Fire's song "Wake Up" from Funeral. Other names reported to be involved are The Yeah Yeah Yeah's Karen O, Deerhunter's Bradford Cox and uber-composer of film scores Carter Burwell who has done work for movies from A Goofy Movie to No Country To Old Men to recent soundtrack chart topper Twilight. Regardless of who took the lead on this one--cough, Burwell, cough--the music is going to be phenomenal. Then there is the cinematography. Judging from thus released sneak peeks and trailers and images this movie is going to be a beautiful, enchanting spectacle. It is lent such an otherworldy feel by the lighting and camera movement that is exactly what it needs to evoke the book. The atmosphere is this unreal mixture of sunny and overcast, like a world where there is no daytime but instead you have dawn, dusk and night. Gorgeous.

Lastly, the cast. The lead is played by real-life Max [Records] who is in his second notable role (the first is this year's The Brother's Bloom) and he is going to be such a household name after this, and what a name I mean Max Records? His parents named him for show business. The rest of the cast is also stacked with Forest Whittaker, Catherine O'Hara, Mark Ruffalo, Catherine Keener, Paul Dano and many others. This movie is definitely something not to miss and I don't think people will. The book which came out in 1963 immediately became a hit with it's generation and all that followed so when this film comes out the audience is sure to be a combination of the four decades that grew up on it and then children who are soon to grow up on it, assuming the parents aren't completely worthless and have any intention of their kids being decent human beings. It is exciting and relieving to know that an attempt at recreating something so everlasting and so great has actually been pulled off. Literally counting the days to this. 163 to go. Told you. Check out the trailer below (any bigger and it would have cut of the edges of the sheer awesomeness) as well as the just released second poster.

By the way, press HD, it really does make it better. Or go to http://www.traileraddict.com/trailer/where-the-wild-things-are/trailer for a larger version. Enjoy!

Goodbye to Dom DeLuise

It's a solemn Cinco de Mayo with the loss of famed actor, and sometimes chef, Dom DeLuise at age 75. The Brooklyn native became known for his signature voice and unparallelled enthusiasm, frequently appearing in Mel Brooks films, most famously in Blazing Saddles as Buddy Bizarre and Spaceballs as Pizza the Hut. Though these may be some of his more notable roles if you're under the age of 30 like me you probably unknowingly grew up with this guy as he played Tiger in the An American Tale films, Fagin in Oliver and Company, and Itchy in All Dogs Go To Heaven and it's follow-ups. Combined all of these characters comprise only a small portion of his huge resume of famous voice-lent and live-action performances. I remember I had a straight to VHS version of Snow White as a sort of sequel, a real masterpiece, called Happily Ever After in which he played the magic mirror so I would have dreams narrated by this teddybear of a man's unmistakable voice as a little girl so I find myself heartbroken by his death. I'm definitely having myself a DeLuise marathon weekend to remember this charming, joyful and funny man. RIP <3.>

I couldn't find the full clip, but one of my favorite parts by him is the first of his reoccuring bit roles in The Muppet Movie, I posted the trailer where it shows him discovering Kermit immediately after singing the great song, "Rainbow Connection". If I find a better clip of it I will replace this one.

2009 Oscars

Okay, so I've hit a lazy patch and havent updated for a while, which is crazy since HELLO the Oscars happened so I should've been so excited that a post would appear immediately following the ceremony but there was honestly so much that I liked/wanted to mention that it kind of intimidated me. Anyway, better late than never!
So this years Academy Awards followed a dramatically different format than those previously and all in all I'm going to have to say upgrade. Despite dragging moments during technical "and the nominees are" I thought the new additions were definitely an aqquired taste, as I got more and more used to and fond of the changes as the show progressed. I'll try to keep it as short and sweet as possible, but here we go. Hugh Jackman who is a Broadway veteran definitely made it a thespian-friendly evening, so being a giant theatre nerd I enjoyed the musical touches he brought to the show (though I did find that whole the muscial is back number weird and random, and with one Vanessa Hudgens too many) and think he proved to be a very charming and capable host buuuut I still wish Billy Crystal would do every show.

The new format for acting catagories was strange, and I didn't buy into it until the second time around when Christopher Walken got on stage, but eventually I found its sappy, self-written vow thing completely precious and enjoyed the personal touches (except for Cuba's total throwaway to poor Robert Downey Jr.) but wish they would have shown clips from the films especially after my friend Katie who hadn't seen several nominated movies had nothing to base the decisions on. It wasn't really suited for those who hadn't seen the performances which is unfortunate. Technical catagories--TOO LONG! Sorry but your catagories are not what the people tune in to see and while I generally enjoy them if they are looking to boost ratings most people don't want to spend 40 minutes watching Will Smith and Sarah Jessica Parker explain why sound editing is important.

Highlights of the evening: Every acceptance speech given was pretty incredible. Not a ton of rambling, even the lesser catagories that have awkward nerdy men accepting managed to have the right amount of sentiment and comedy, so I was totally impressed. The acting winners we're eloquent, just sappy enough and for some of the first times generally seemed surprised and excited. I cried a lot so I got exactly what I wanted. Heath Leger's family did a great job of commemorating his work and making it about a celebration of his life and for those who continue to do what he loved. Beautiful. Hands down though the most incredible speech of the evening came from the ever-charismatic, wire-walking Phillippe Petit who put most simply and most beautifully everything that can be said about what is special about filmmaking.

Perfect. Awesome. I die. And I guess I should include this guy too because he made my dreams come true when he uttered the last four words of his speech.

I'm also gonna give a +1 to Anne Hathaway for her contributions to the opening number and her clear humility about the nomination and crying over being personally addressed and complimented by Shirley MacLaine. Other bests of the night came from the hilarious short with Pinapple Express stars Seth Rogen and James Franco (and of course cinematographer Janusz Kaminski), Ben Stiller's great impression of Joaquin Pheonix (did I see a little McCain in there too?) and the musical performances from the soundtrack of Slumdog Millionaire. Youtube them, you'll find yourself entertained.

Okay, this is already like three times longer than I intended so I'm just gonna go ahead and pat myself on the back for finally finishing this post and for what I'd call some pretty damn good predictions. Now, back to normal non-award show related posting, promise.

In Case You Missed It: Death to Smoochy

I'm going to attempt to showcase a bit of a throwback or widely unknown movie weekly from now on, the first would've been Millions but that would make it tri-monthly so we'll just make this the starting point. Seriously, this movie, awesome. Why it wasn't a huge hit I'll never know but I encourage everyone to see this immediately. While it recieved much acclaim and gets regular airtime on Comedy Central (nice in, Jon Stewart) I still don't very often meet people who've seen or heard of it. So here is your insentive.

First of all, what a cast. I mean Norton, Keener, DeVito, Williams, Stewart, little people! It follows angelic, aspiring children's singer/songwriter Sheldon Mopes aka Smoochy (Norton) when he is picked up by reluctant, cynical and in some cases corrupt children's network execs (Keener, Stewart) following the downfall of their most popular star and host Rainbow Randolph (Williams) who then makes it his personal mission to destroy Mopes and the Smoochy-mania he has innocently created. Williams turns in yet another hilarious performance. I attribute his greatness in the role to the complete low-life, scum he plays so well, so crassly and with such unapologetic energy. The number of times you will hear him say cock, dick, fuck, and all those other yummy things he only ever gets to say in his stand-up make me happier than just about anything else. Then there is Danny DeVito, who plays Sheldon's weasel agent (who is a lot like an R-rated version of his character in Matilda) and tries to bring him down to the no bullshit, rough, hard real world of children's television--how can this not be funny? Keener, known more recently for her role in The 40 Year Old Virgin succeeds in being a greedy bitch yet somehow lovable, very lovable, and also slutty. You throw in the irish mafia and Spinner, who is practically Anthony Quinn from Requiem for a Heavyweight reincarnated, to a mix where you already have Edward Norton--formally covered in swastikas in American History X--gallavanting around in a pink rhino suit teaching children in sing-song and this movie is definitely hysterical. Other signs of comic genius:
Robin Williams handling phallic cookies? Check.
A guy named Buggy Ding Dong? Check.
Directed by Danny DeVito? Check.
Nazi rally? Check.
Yeah, thats pretty much all it takes for me to know something will be enjoyable, I don't want to give away all of the hilarious tidbits that make this movie great but in all honesty it is a movie that you know must have been so fun for these actors to just be silly and try to create some sort of modern, fluffy film noir. I'm not saying someone should slap a bunch of stars on the DVD case because it isn't really attempting to prove anything it is however an attempt gone right at mocking pre-pubescent culture and anytime someone can take something like that and flip it around into something grim and sleazy I think it deserves credit for originality and general hootzpah. The next time you see it on Comedy Central take a while to check it out, even if you hate it tell people about it, then you can both talk about how much you hated it or fight over how much someone else loved it. Point is, see it, spread the word!

My Rating: B+
(In my opinion the following trailer doesn't do much justice but nonetheless, here ya go.)

Oscar Predictions Con't.

Best Actor in a Supporting Role








There is NO debate on who will bring home the award for Best Supporting Actor. Heath Ledger is tragically going to recieve his first Oscar posthumanously, however it does little to detract from his chilling portrayal of the Joker in The Dark Knight. A movie that lives through his genius performance is certainly a worthy end to a legacy of incredible talent and infectious personality. The only questions left are who will accept on his behalf and whether future nominees in this catagory will be able to match his gift.

Best Actress in a Supporting Role








Okay, aside from Marisa Tomei who I did not like in The Wrestler I think this catagory is really well stocked. Amy Adams from Doubt is defintely a front runner to me and my second favorite of the performances but my number one is without a doubt Penelope Cruz in Vicky Cristina Barcelona. First off the movie is visually stunning, but the foreign stars (Cruz and Javier Bardem) absolutely outshine the American leads (Scarlett Johansson and Rebecca Hall). Cruz gives an outstanding performance as a complex artist and freespirit who comes back into the life of her estranged husband and his new love interest and mistress. She is exquiste, a beautiful but unstable character made real. Amazing.

Best Picture








The masterpiece Slumdog Millionaire. I see this film getting top billing for the night, and I find it likely to take home Best Picture, Best Cinematography and Best Editing. I cant even begin to explain all the unreal things about this movie so I won't, I'll just say that it is the definitely the best picture of the year.

Best Director









Not only will Slumdog Millionaire take home tons of awards but it's director too. Well, not tons but the one that matters. This is Danny Boyle's year!

Other Awards

Some of the awards I am still marinating on, but these are a few that I've pretty much picked.

Best Animated Picture - WALL-E
Best Costume Design - Australia or The Dutchess
Best Documentary - Man on Wire (amazing!)
Best Foreign Language film - Waltz with Bashir
Best Editing - Slumdog Millionaire
Best Cinematography - Slumdog Millionaire
Best Makeup - Curious Case of Benjamin Button
Best Visual Effects - Curious Case of Benjamin Button
Best Adapted Screenplay - Way too close to call this year!
Best Original Screenplay - Happy-Go-Lucky

And The Nominees Are...

Yesterday was the SuperBowl--poor Kurt Warner--but my SuperBowl is actually on February 22nd and I'm way too excited, the Oscars! The peak of award show season is coming up fast and while there is still slightly less than a month to consider before the big night I already have most of my winners picked, so here are my choices for the best of the year.

Best Actor in a Leading Role








By far my absolute favorite catagory this year I feel like the Best Actor is going to be a toss-up between these guys (sorry Brad, sorry Richard). I'm so excited for this one because these performances have been so good that the pre-Oscar awards (SAG, Critic's Choice, Golden Globes, etc.) have not gone to the same person, something very a-typical and rare especially for the Best Actor award. I think the main contest will end up between Sean Penn for MILK and Mickey Rourke for The Wrestler, however I have to throw Frank Langella in for his spot-on portrayal of Richard Nixon in Frost/Nixon which is actually my favorite performance of the bunch but doesn't seem likely to win. Sean Penn, an Oscar vet, seems set up for another and having won the Critic's Choice award this year he fits the tradition of Critic's Choice winners going on to take home the big prize. He was spectacular in MILK and would be more than deserving of an award but in all honesty if I was voting I would pick this year's Cinderella, Mickey Rourke. His work in The Wrestler was the most subtle and real performance so it may not seem as obvious as Penn's but that is what makes it so amazing. To come from where he was and have this opportunity, one he may never get again, makes the idea of him winning the award very romantic. Besides, I just find his rough genuineness so refreshing and feel like he doesn't expect the win which makes the surprise and gratitude that much more sincere.

Who do I think will win? Penn. Who do I want to win? Rourke!

Best Actress in a Leading Role


Hands down, Kate Winslet! First of all, 0-5!? The fact that she has been nominated that many times but still has not won is the silliest thing to me! She is officially the most nominated female (and is the youngest actor ever with that many nods) without having won and is notorious for being the runner-up, always managing to be slightly overlooked by major film awards. Actually, in her history she has only ever been recognized as a winner once--ONCE!--with a BAFTA for Sense and Sensibility before this year's long overdue slew of awards. Of the 25 films shes been in there are only 11 that she has not been nominated for a major award in, though they continuously are critically acclaimed performances, so she has a history of being teased with nominations only to get screwed over! This is the first year she has had constant wins, particularly at the Golden Globes where she won Best Actress for Revolutionary Road and Best Supporting Actress for The Reader and finally because I think she is the greatest female actor alive. She is long overdue for an Oscar, plus I fucking love it when people cry when they win and as we've had a chance to see she is just a hot mess and I totally eat it up. I cried when she talked about Leo at the Golden Globes so I just can't wait. It's strange that the nomination is for The Reader but I actually think if I had to nominate just one of her roles I would choose that one too; as great as she is in both there is just no excuse for her performance as Hanna Schmitz...it's literally absurd how amazing she is.
Sure, Meryl Streep was great in Doubt but she is always great, in Changeling Angelina Jolie really wants her son--who I'm sure she adopted at some point during filming--back, and Melissa Leo deserves her Frozen River nomination (Anne Hathaway doesn't get to win an Oscar because she's Anne Hathaway, despite a great performance) but this one is Kate Winslet's. And I totally had to include a clip of her Globes speech because it is just too sweet and lovely.

SIXTH TIME'S THE CHARM!

Megan Fox: Ruining Movies and Introducing Adolescent Boys to Their Penises

Megan Fox sucks. Clearly she's famous because she's mini-Angelina Jolie and not because she has any talent whatsoever. She even found her own trashy male companion Brian Austin Green--I don't get it either--a la Billy Bob Thornton (three part names, the similarities just keep coming) to show that while she is a very pretty hooker, she still isn't good enough to snag a celebrity that has mattered in the last 12 years. At least Billy Bob had Sling Blade and Monster's Ball...and Bad Santa. That being said perhaps I'm just biased because I cant look at her without seeing the villain from Mary-Kate and Ashley's Holiday In the Sun and hearing her mutter "I want Jordan", but I don't care because her bitch face and her whole I-dated-a-Russian-stripper to add to my slutty famewhore appeal annoys me. Then again, I might just be upset because she's cast as the lead in Diablo Cody's next film Jennifer's Body which is sure to be huge because Diablo Cody (Juno writer) is great and because it's about a possessed cheerleader who gets to go on a black widowesque killing spree, fun. If there's one thing I don't need is Diablo's awesome writing making Megan Fox look funny or talented. I'm not looking for any reasons to like this girl, I'm content with my jealous and marginally attractive hatred. We get it Megan, you're hot, now fucking go away.

In Case You Missed It: Millions

I finally watched this movie after attempting it for about a week now, and while I'm not surprised by my immediate love for something the recently unstoppable Danny Boyle thought up I was surprised about some of the films themes and how they remained true to their goals without ever lecturing or becoming stagnant in delivery. Made in 2004 the story of Millions revolves around Damien (Alex Etel) Cunningham, a young boy who's mother has recently passed away, and his search for goodness in the world after having a mysterious sack of money literally fall into his lap. The New York Times explains the movies focus as, "...the secret world of children, in particular that miraculous, tragically brief interlude when the young imagination - not yet captive to crippling adult conventions like time, space and rational thought - takes boundless flight."

The protagonist, Damian, is a wonderfully odd and new kind of lead character, driving the story through an unexpected path. The character stresses an incredibly ethical viewpoint on life throughout the film--interacting with copious saints about whom he has an awing knowledge--however the context never becomes religious or preaches, which is a real feat. The dialogue is fresh and really very entertaining as there is a 7-year-old boy coming to realizations that none of the adults around him are able to grasp and allowing them to realize how strange it is that they remain confused despite the simplicity of the intended lessons. The writing is strong, writer Frank Cottrell Boyce even recieving the BAFTA for best screenplay and Danny Boyle creates some vibrant, abstract scenes that echo likenesses to Trainspotting. The movie never bored me, keeping my focus with interesting progressions in the plot and exciting dialogue however the star of the film is just that, it's young star Alex Etel. Nominated for a Critics Choice Award for Best Young Actor but slimly losing he posseses the chops of an actor well beyond his years and delivers a heartwarming but commanding role.

All in all I would give this movie a thumbs up for its subtle and impressive ability to cross between the genres of comedy, drama and fantasy, and for Etel's excellent debut performance. While it may not contain the dramatic meat and bones of a serious festival flick, nor the extreme budget and effects of a blockbuster this little movie achieves more than is expected of it and is certainly worth all the acclaim it has recieved. Definitely the best PG-rated movie I have ever seen, it was a very fun, afternoon snack of a movie!

RottenTomatoes.com rating: 88%

FilmCritic.com rating: 4 out of 5 stars

My Rating: A-

Read the Onion review here: http://www.avclub.com/articles/millions,4644/

Are movies getting better?

The last two years have shown an incredible leap upwards in the quality of movies. While it is not true of every film, as 2007 did give us the shining piece of cinematic crap that is I Know Who Killed Me and 2008 has seen the continuation of the [Genre] Movie series, the movies that appeared on the "Best" end of the spectrum seem to be significantly better than those produced in and before 2006. Every year does have it's standout films like that of 2005's Crash or 2006's The Departed but in the final two years of the Bush administration the competition has become much thicker for Best Picture contenders. For the first time since Beauty and the Beast there is an animated film (WALL-E) allegedly slated for entry in the Best Picture catagory thanks to unparalleled effects, a documentary (Man on Wire) which showcases no death and destruction--or depicts an angry Michael Moore--is the frontrunner for an Oscar, and the race for Best Picture is set to go to the foreign-produced Slumdog Millionare which aside from critical hype is likely one of the greatest cinematic achievements of a decade.

The phrase "its an honor just to have been nominated" has become a justified reaction for nominees of the past two years as the catagories have consistently be comprised of remarkable performances and technical achievements, all of which would be worthy to garner Oscar wins. With award season upon us I am relieved that for the second year in a row I am able to truly look forward to the ceremony with a great degree of hope for some nominees but an exciting sense of uncertainty about who will take home the actual prizes. From what I've read and heard about some of this year's most anticipated releases I have a great feeling that 2009 will show another score of amazing movies, and I hope the trend will only continue from there!